You didn’t want to fall in love with her.
You just wanted a fix and you try to find her in everyone and every thing;
But nothing truly satisfies.
You play it off like it’s merely
A wasp sting.
But every time her snaggletooth
Bulks out when she smiles.
And every time she tucks her hair behind her ear,
Or every time she cackles.
When you know it’s not you she’s reacting to,
It chips a little at your heart because you know you want her, but you can’t.
You can’t have her because you’re too scared to love.
You’ve been hurt before- almost a bullet to the Brain and if she hurt you;
This time it would blow your skull out.
She doesn’t know that,
But she knows that you both met
At the wrong time.
You’ll get caught in what once was
The string of connection you two had,
But now you're raveled in all these other “affairs”.
Before you realize you’re stuck in all of these Sparks you’ve tried to start with all the others.
(An evidence board of connections, they call it.)
She’s cut her end.
She’s left you in what you
Think you both still have.
Your end is still entangled
Through all your other lovers.
You won’t realize she’s moved on.
She’s shed every capsule of her heart while
You were still trying to find who to give yours to.
Once you unwhirl all the interests you tried to Distract yourself with and realized it was her,
She cut her end loose.
Now you’re waiting for someone to retie your end of your weakened, sprawled apart aglet with theirs.
But none will be as strong as the aglet
You mended with her.
Maybe you both will meet in a thrift store or a coffee shop with no one glued to either of your strings.
Both of your ends will never be tied together again.